Friend, do not indulge in self-pity.
Be glad you know the Risen Saviour who died that you may have Life.
You were not perfect when you were saved and all the sins of life engulfed you (and everyone else in this world).
The daily walk with Jesus is important because He is guiding and teaching and we should be growing in Knowledge and Wisdom.
It is easy to beg and ask for God to change our circumstances. But God says it is better to have a thorn in our side than to pick us up and drop us down somewhere else. The reason being that the "somewhere else" will also have it's own set of problems (sinners) to deal with and soon we will be begging and crying again for relief.
Better to learn of His Ways and how to overcome the problems that beset us and walk through them with Jesus by our side than to be removed from them.
God is making a Way for you right now and it is best to stay constant in your faith and remain close through prayer. Walk in His Light and Peace and Comfort. Know He is with you and making a Way where there seems to be no way.
Learn to forgive as you have been forgiven. Keep looking up to Him to experience the wonderful beauty that is the Lamb of God, the Holy Sacrifice, the One who loves you completely.
No more self-pity! It is a means by which God can help you to grow in His Light. Accept the burden as a beautiful gift - it keeps you close to your Saviour. Without it you may wander and get lost again - He knows the true state of your soul and spirit and what it needs to stay faithful.